Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
i didn't know you could wash puke off of bras with a dishwasher.
Funniest shit happened at the grocery store. This kid kept asking his mom for candy over and over and she told him 'daddy said no' and he screamed 'he isn't my dad' so loud everyone in the store was silent it was awesome.
Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
The man at the Honda dealership told me I smell like vodka and probably shouldn't be driving.
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
I don't appreciate you drunk dressing passed-out me in spandex for bed
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
Bring one of those heart stabber things in case you go into shock. I'll jab you.
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
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