Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
Hows this for an invention: a toilet that weighs your poop
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
WHY ARE THERE NO BLACK EMOJIS? I CAN NEVER PROPERLY IDENTIFY MYSELF.
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
Umm my dog ate your vibrator. Sorry 😬
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
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