My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
You told the bartender you needed 2 beers, and a shot of his cum...
Being this Hungover on Easter has brought my closer to Jesus... I swear he had to feel shitty like this after coming back from the dead
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
Being drunk at Chick-fil-A is a dystopian experience
Shame - the story of my life.
Randomize
