found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
Just got a lapdance on the metro. She said she was on maternity leave and needed the practice.
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
I just got a free round of shots. Don't you DARE fuckin tell me that A-cup boobs can't get you good things.
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
I just found a bag of chex mix in my clutch
You were feeding it to the bartender last night
Randomize
