is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
just took a pee in my own yard...decided i had to poo..only got a dingle berry....wiped it away with my finger..help me...my mom AND dad are home.
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
Sometimes I think I'm witty and funny, and then I realize it 3pm and I'm drunk
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
The moment buddy the elf found out he was human is exactly like the moment I realized I was gay
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