but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
dressing as green man for st patrick's day = free drinks all night long
I just added 'steal mom's xanax' to my to do list for when I go home for Easter.
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
We're the only two others left at work. My internal monologue is going: TAKE ME. TAKE ME NOWW. ON THE COUNTER. IN FRONT OF THE MANAGER. JUST TAKE MEEE
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
he just fucked me for my cheese.
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
Randomize