Needless to say when I told my parents they loved me less
Plan B is the new Plan A
I just took my friends on a tour of all the places I've had sex in my house. I dont know if that's more slutty, or the fact that it took 2 hours to complete..
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
Before attempting to fly away into the night you asked me to take care of your sister. I agreed.
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
I learned that I order a bunch of dollar shots at the bar and once it's ready turned around and say "who wants pay?" And someone will pay
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
Randomize
