you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
Keeping my bail papers as a souvenir from when I was arrested. Too weird?
Babe, the 4 years we've been together have been amazing. Will you marry me?
are you seriously doing this over text message
hahaha no, but i am dumping you.
I want a vodka facial right about now. I'm talking about straight vodka bukkake
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
And I was chasing apple pie moonshine (provided by cops) with bud light limeys. In a golf cart, wearing a tiara.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
Randomize
