just took a cab, driver just asked what i'd been drinking- i said vodka, he said "can't do vodka-drunk, it makes me feel like i'm giving birth to myself" ...no comment
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
One of the bamboo sticks broke and impaled him. I think he's drunk enough that it shouldn't hurt until tomorrow.
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
You were laying in bed whispering and crying to the half eaten burrito saying "why am I shitting so much" and "what did I do to deserve this"
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
Whenever I see women with terribly drawn on brows, I just wanna tackle them and redo them and run away. I'll be Brow-lady. The beauty superhero
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
Randomize