i'm almost one hundred percent positive that i have a warrant out for my arrest in this city. i also don't give a fuck because im drinking TEQUILAAAA
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
You convinced her to break up with her boyfriend, made out with her all night, got her to buy us all shots then went home with a different girl...
That explains the "i hate you" text. But the facebook deletion is a bit harsh
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
Randomize
