Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
just found a piece of pizza in my dresser.....i remember you saying you were going to save one for later so i'm assuming this is your doing
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
So I just chugged the rest of the wine in my mug so I would have something to eat my corn flakes in. With a plastic fork. I need a dishwasher
And maybe a life coach?
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
Pretty sure the delivery guy saw me taking a shit this morning
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
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