So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
Bring your kids so they can distract our kids so we can drink beer in peace.
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
It was the best present I've gotten since I was 5 and I got a fucking easy bake oven. I'm not pregnant for realsies. Celebratory party at the house tonight. Invite all the nice dicks you know.
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
Taking one of the loudest shits ever at work and I have to say...I'm having a better time than I thought I would
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