my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
Me. At least after what I've been through.
Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
Sean getting laid is an anomaly, Sean banging the hottest single girl at the wedding is a fucking unicorn being ridden by a leprechaun walking through mordor.
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
Woke up this morning with my period. Saw a commercial for the beginning of Shark Week. I see what you did there, Mother Nature. My pad's off to you.
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
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