trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
He sent me a 2am email the just said "Ping". Nerdiest booty call ever.
Randomize
