She's JV to your varsity
Do vagina's smell?
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
Immaculate conception is definitely the most boring way to conceive a child.
you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
We snorted a line of cocaine and xanax, and then played a game of Backgammon. It was surprisingly therapeutic.
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
Pretty sure that I just proved those labels that say "non-flammable" wrong. totally unrelated, We just made your futon fly with a shitload of fireworks
There is a woman in the stall next to me giving a pep talk to her daughter that wants to call off her wedding. I'm afraid to pee!
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