he asked me what things i liked that he did in bed, and i told him all the things i hated so he would use it on that new bitch and she wouldnt hook up with him anymore.
you for real need to get over him dude
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
She went to the bathroom before i broke up with her so i changed all 2500 of her songs on her computer to "I'm a cheating whore"
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
He told me I smelled like fruit loops and then bit me on the tit
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
How ya feelin sunshine?
Like a million dollars! ... That has been hit by a bus, drowned under water and beat repeatedly by a shovel.
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