Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
My life has hit rock bottom, I'm watching a movie on lifetime about retarded people falling in love. And I'm jealous of their relationship.
is there any particular reason you took a shit in a zip lock bag and left it in my refrigerator?
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
I guess I really am the only person in this world who can successfully have a no-strings-attached threesome on the beach.
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
My sunday was babysitting three big, drunk, crying Swedes. Unless your day involved four or more giant drunk swedes I don't want to hear about it.
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
You're a disaster
Wanna date?
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
Maybe the "i killed someone" and "tequila makes my clothes come off" comments freaked him out.
Randomize
