3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
he just booty called me in advance instead of waiting til 3 am when hes trashed. i think thats really considerate and gentlemanlike.
I walked into cold stone and the guy started preparing a supersized birthday cake remix for "Mrs. Munchies"
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
Dude he's the best wing man ever. He starts creepin' on a woman, and she clings on to you out of fear.
Everyone looked at me like I just fucked a gopher and was wearing it like a hat
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
I'm not saying I haven't been that drunk. I'm just saying I haven't been that drunk and then have cops buy me shots.
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
You drunkenly promised dick pics on your way out the door and then never delivered. I don't know how I'll ever be able to trust you again.
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
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