I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
Thanks for making breakfast. I usually have cereal and coffee...but i think margaritas and turkey sandwiches could catch on.
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
You pulled down your pants, pissed in the recliner, and wiped yourself with my utility bill. I thought it was in the worlds best interest to put you to bed.
Boobs speak an international language.
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
Btw I definitely had pizza sauce on my face, a painful hickey on my neck, and I just remember screaming SISTER WIVES because of the girl's 1997 jean skirt! Wow.
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
I just realized I'm not wearing clothes. I think my pants may be in the kitchen but I have no idea where my shirt is. I'm kinda worried.
Only true party girls take their birth control with Smirnoff.
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