People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
i'm behind the bar giving him a hand job. i need stuff to make my foot stop itching.
okay, this is where i needed to clarify that i was kidding before when i said that jizz helps mosquito bites. but let me know how that goes. for future reference.
Last night was just one giant freudian slip.
You made out with EVERYBODY.
Can I just bleach my life?
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
Hey man, he's too drunk to remember what you said. What drugs are we buying and when should we expect them?
Randomize
