i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
A little girl and i are having a face making battle in mcdonalds
She started it, but I totally finished it.
I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
It's okay, I found my phone in the toaster oven. Logical explanation: 5 martinis
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
Put an egg in my coffee filter this morning. I think I am still drunk.
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
ok first of all what the fuck
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
Randomize
