i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
Yo, my girl thinks she's pregnant, so I've got a DD for the wedding. Sweet.
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
I'm eating cereal out of the pocket of my flannel right now
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
Don't feel bad sweetie, you're not the only classy one in town. I'm still driving around with that tupperware of tequila in my cup holder from last week's Margarita Monday.
Also, sex on a first date is no, right? Really, I just don't want to clean my apartment, but I'm trying to hide behind "morals" in an effort to appear less lazy.
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
You called me into the kitchen so you could show me that you were peeing in the kitchen sink and then told me to leave bc you couldn't do it with me watching
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
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