Whod you bang
Just passed a Taco Bell Taco Supreme, still in its wrapper, laying in the grass. I'd like a moment of silence.
May it rest in peace.
Is it weird being in the house without any roommates?
Nah, just masturbating louder
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
He tried to give me a shoulder massage while i peed in the neighbors bushes to "make it more relaxing."... I let him... That drunk
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
Do you think there are other mothers looking at porn in the carpool line?
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
Weirdest drunk sex ever. His sweat dripped into my eyeball and then he looked down and asked me why I was crying. I went with it.
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
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