remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
I bought beer tonight and got 3 coupons with my receipt. Paper towels, laundry detergent, and Advil. I wonder if Stop & Shop predicts the future or just does this with every beer purchase.
I'm way too drunk on a Sunday to handle this level of Jesus.
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
Me either. I want to get 'chase a stray cat through the neighborhood in my hooker heels' drunk. And it's your birthday, so you have to get 'best friend holding your hair while you puke in the bar bathroom and cry about your life' drunk. In a feather boa.
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
...I think i just fell in love with a random undergrad at first glance. He was the awkward young adult version of captain hook. Dear god i need to get off this campus.
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
Randomize
