Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
You are just a treasure cave of fabulous alcoholic ideas.
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
tell me about the fingering
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