I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
So he just rolled over in his sleep and said "that's a punctuation mark..."
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
It's election day and I was just tied up with an American flag scarf
I was just thinking about all the dick I could catch while I am home. But then I realized I am too lazy to get out of my pjs and leave my cat.
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
Just motorboated this 18 year old girl at the bar. The first time was my idea the other 3 she made me. Maybe turning 27 won't be so bad. Haha.
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