There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
last time I sleep in the lobby. woke up to some girl asking me what floor I lived on. somebody put me, couch included, on the elevator.
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
We realized he wasn't with us anymore, so we turn around and he's 20 feet back, peeing on a squirrel.
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
Okay who let me pass out in a recliner cuddling a pitbull and a cardboard cutout of Orlando Bloom
I swear to the sweet baby jesus I didn't fill your freezer with salsa and my little pony toys, but I didn't stop them either.
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
Never remove your contact lenses after eating an entire bag of spicy doritos.
He turned on read receipts specifically so i'd know he was ignoring me.
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
Randomize
