Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
I told him I thought I was pregnant and he told me he accidentally killed my bird.
Circle of life.
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
Randomize