Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
booty call
i swear to god if you come over i will kick you in the pussy.
Correction, I've been on a lot of dates and a lot of dicks
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
I just took a dump to end all dumps. Other dumps have already written ballads about it. It was the Armageddon dump. Bruce Willis was there, it was awful.
I was just tryna bring you beer girl. I should've known you'd be shirtless though
It only takes one line of cocaine, and you try to shotput a fucking kitchen table
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
Trouble in the neighborhood - turns out my brother's summer lawn care gig also entailed banging three different MILFs and they just all found out about each other
Gotta pay for college somehow...
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