Haha she couldn't find her dress in the morning. So she left it. How do the hell do I discreetly return that to her at work. More importantly, how did she discreetly do the walk of shame??
i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
U know u have sex too much when u have lube in ur rolliball on ur blackberry
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
I just got a ticket for the snow penis we made in our front yard.
Hmm. I hear gunshots, car horns blaring, hear drunk white people screaming, and see about fifty status updates pertaining to the hawks. I guess they won.
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
Randomize
