Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
You can't just hum the Jaws theme song when you pull down my pants.
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
Many a woman has been in tears over the passing of my penis' whorish ways.
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
I'm a terrible person when I drink. I went from fine to not making any sense and yelling about cheese in like 30 seconds.
I am drunkenly riding a razor scooter up and down the hills of Cincinnati
What in the fuck are you doing with your life
If you need me I'll be in the hospital involving super glue and fake eyelashes.
Randomize
