i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
I told a kindergarten student that candy canes are bones of reject elves.
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
my roommate's gf just broke up with him and hes in his room crying and listening to coldplay while beating off to pictures of her...
Acid is not a monday night drug
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
Hi future me, I saved you a big mac under the bed.
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
Randomize
