my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
You are the voice of reason. And I'm bringing wine. Like seriously this is his last chance. Don't touch me once, shame on you.. Don't touch me twice, shame on me
So we just accidentally broke into a building from the third floor while carrying shovels. The security guards are still very confused
Is it counter productive to ride on my exercise bike with a cocktail in hand?
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
Well my normal tinder strategy of "Will I have sex with her when I'm sober" has been paying off
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
Also: I hate her so much. She's out at hooters, making spelling errors, while I'm literally sitting at a clinic getting std tested. Which of us won the morality award in this break up.
Randomize
