But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
not my fault. i got her to believe he wrote an oasis song. he still managed to find a way to make sure no girl ever gets near his penis.
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
I just found her phone in the quesadilla maker...
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
I may or may not be taking a bath listening to the Phantom of the Opera. This lovely moment brought to you by xanax.
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
Bored of what? I stayed up all night researching sex toys because I'm excited to do things with you that I haven't done in 29 years of having a body.
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
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