I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
if i get killed by an online date, its your job to tell my parents that we met at church
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
Apparently I was so drunk I threw my entire wallet at the stripper on stage. That was the third time I should've gotten kicked out.
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
Oh and I ate all of your Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Consider it part of your reparation payment for accidental anal insertion. I may continue to collect payments until I am no longer sore.
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
My dad just said "fuck circus"
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
She asked me to tell her the three words every girl wants to hear so I whispered "I play hockey" in her ear.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize