I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
I'm waiting for seagulls to eat this throw up
i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
Hey, could you leave the door unlocked? Keys seem hard right now.
There is a semi-attractive guy at the door who's looking for you. Says he met you on Chatroulette. Start explaining NOW.
Apparently I was trying to convince him Springsteen has had buttsex. I ended the argument with "I bet he came from it too."
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
Stop calling me, Mom. I'm in his closet. You're gonna blow my cover and I'm about to catch this lying SOB.
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
had to remind myself that killing him is not a good career move AGAIN.
Randomize
