Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
But guess what. I'm gonna roll over and go to sleep cuz there's no cuddling in phone sex.
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
I filled two of the glass ornaments in my mom's bathroom last night with vodka. That way no one sees me drinking on Christmas. Alcoholic or genius? All I know it makes bathroom trips frequent and enjoyable.
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
You licked my eyeball, you are officially cut off. If you just missed you can have a second chance on Friday.
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
The moral of the story is this:the last shot of the night is always a mistake
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
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