Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
Hmm. I hear gunshots, car horns blaring, hear drunk white people screaming, and see about fifty status updates pertaining to the hawks. I guess they won.
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
I'm waiting at the bar and am surrounded by unattractive women.
You need to get here and rebalance this disturbance in the force.
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
Dude, I passed out on the side walk, lost my phone and shirt, and walked 12 miles home after I disappeared from the club
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
Straight up just cock blocked my dad. Also this apple sauce is good.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
Randomize
