Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
He called me 'pal' while complimenting how well I took his load on my face. I've officially been fuckbuddy-zoned.
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
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