his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
We left the bar in 2 bicycle cabs. It cost thirty bucks and they took us to the wrong hotel. When we finally made it to the right one we ended up in a room with three randos from alaska. Jammed out with them for like an hour. Those inuits are good guitar players
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
Today's hangover is a "wear sunglasses while pooping in the dark" kind of day
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
Watching the Walking Dead, snuggled up naked, and drinking a beer. No better way.
If ever there was a tweet to describe your life, it's this.
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
When you wake up to a porn star on your couch telling you, you better tell your boyfriend about last night.
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
Randomize
