Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
I was sitting behind this girl in class and she logged out of her facebook, hacked into her boyfriends, and then proceeded to check his inbox. This is why I'm single.
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
Wouldn't life be so much easier if you could just walk up to attractive men and say, "Let me bear your children" and it wouldn't be creepy?
Or possibly end in a restraining order?
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
Over Bumbled last night. I think I set my dog up on a date Sunday afternoon. I have to drive him, meet the other dog’s dad and secretly drink a bottle of champagne from a “water bottle”. This is not what I expected 30 to be like.
I swear I only fuck him for the huge bottle of smart water he gives me afterwards.
Randomize
