Shitting during a conference call is so empowering.
And then you told your sister how horrible of a friend I was because I couldn't get you cheese fries...
i forgot to tell you that olivia sent me a text yesterday that the mormon girl got caught with weed in her vagina at school
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
We just fucked like crazy and now I'm dipping chips in macaroni & cheese. I feel completely accomplished. This may be the best day ever.
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
Randomize
