you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
Me+graduation party+hammered drunk+polish horseshoes in the dark= black eye, crying, pissed, passed out in my dress... How was your weekend?
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
im just gonna lie here and collect money in this whoppers bag while sprawled out on this bench and explain that its to buy weed for my hangover
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
Randomize
