That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK.
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
I make one hell of a fire on Ambien. Other life choices not so much. But fire. Fire I can do.
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
The tequila covers up the fact that the choco liquor tastes like sadness.
this is a preemptive text before you call me freaking out: i have your keys and your car is parked safely a block down from your apartment.
you are a goddess
I still have a little drunk in my system
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
Randomize
