i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
last night I mixed vodka in with my protein shake... and you tell me my new years resolution was impossible
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
Randomize
