It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
Worrying about "What smells like cat pee?" is so much easier than worrying about "What am I doing with my life?"
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
Remember how I made that resolution to remain celibate for 6 months? Well, I just broke that
You literally made that 4 hours ago...
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
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