Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
Apple trackpads and semen don't mix. On the way to the Apple Store.
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawnmower thinking of you
I know. I know. The man who pulled me from my mother's womb was the same man who had his fingers in my vagina today. My life is a joke. I don't know how to feel about this.
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
Boredom is so much more tolerable when you're stoned off your ass.
Randomize
