Only a mothe r could love this liver
I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
my make-up looks really good tonight. I swear it had nothing to do with me finishing all of your strawberry vodka.
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
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