guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
I don't know man, I woke up and shes here acting like she knows me, wearing my clothes, and scrambling eggs in my kitchen. I don't know her.
You were drinking with me last night, I warned you.
I still have a little drunk in my system
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
There's a video of you almost falling asleep in a bar stool listening to Jimmy Buffett. Nekkid.
Randomize
