I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
I have six new people in my phone that I don't remember adding. One of them is "Bourbon Yeah." Successful evening?
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
Randomize
